Sharing: Giving Up Fear, Embracing Courage

Silence isn’t a luxury in addiction recovery. Years of drug and alcohol use and abuse teaches you many things, one item of instruction being what happens when you stay quiet about your struggles. Fear of opening up about your mental strife only serves to keep you in bondage. Secrecy is a symptom of your disease; as if your condition knows it will lose power over you if you open up with another person. We are, in fact, as sick as our secrets! As a result, active addiction persists long after one’s self-destructive behaviors become untenable.

All of us, in recovery or not, have fear regarding what others think of us. Even those who ardently protest their lack of concern or care for what other people think about them struggle to open the door for their peers' opinions. Humans regularly fear the truth, understanding the reasons for trepidation is not easy; we all have our reasons for taciturnity when it comes to discussing what is going on beneath the surface. It is unfortunate, that fear is a pervasive driving force in most people's lives; because if we don’t talk about our problems how can we expect ever to heal.

Recovering from any form of mental illness requires individuals to throw caution to the wind, mostly. Ironically, the longer one's active addiction persists, the easier it becomes for a person to do just that, choosing to resist fear and surrender. When a person nears the edge of spiritual annihilation, they are better able to toss aside illusions of control. When an individual realizes they are not in control of their future, they can ask for help. Pleas for help are, in most cases, audible; when there is smoke, yelling fire alerts your peers. Asking for help gets you into treatment, asking for help brings your support network to your side in recovery.

 

Help Surrounds You

In early recovery, you’ll learn right away the vital importance of your peers, of fellowship. Whether you are working the 12 Steps, SMART Recovery, or a faith-based modality, there is one glaring similarity; lasting recovery hinges on one’s ability to work with and rely on others for support. Nobody who works a program of recovery is perfect, and no one is ever cured; we’re all works in progress, which means that there will be days that you don’t feel like you can continue doing the next right thing. What you do in those hours of darkness can dictate the future of your program. Will you speak up and talk to your peers in a meeting or one-on-one, or will you be unforthcoming?

Recovery provides allies who can assist in overcoming any problem we are having in life. Naturally, some issues are extra-personal; it’s best to choose with care who you share such things with, probably with someone who you feel most comfortable, i.e., sponsor. You should talk about problems that you are having even if you think they are unworthy of discussing. There is an excellent chance your peers have dealt with a similar situation. Remember, there is little if anything you can say that will scare or shock an addict or alcoholics. Keep in mind the dark places most people in recovery escaped in opting for recovery.

In many cases, individuals struggle or take issue with a component of the program. Failing to see the value of something often leads people to resist doing it, a choice that can prove detrimental to one’s program. If ever you feel an aspect of recovery doesn’t suit you, rather than just opting out, why not share your feelings with the group. There are no wrong questions in recovery and your opinion matters; it’s likely that somebody else in the meeting shares your concern. When you share and ask questions, you are helping other people who may not yet have the strength to address the group.

 

Giving Up Fear, Embracing Courage

Again, silence isn’t a luxury you can afford in recovery. Silence keeps us from the sunshine of the spirit; it cuts us off from fellowship. Without community, no one would be long for recovery. With that in mind, do you have questions or problems that are affecting your program? If so, raise your hand or stand up at your next meeting; throw your reservations to the wind and seek guidance. Every time you share in a meeting it is an exercise in courage, speaking up makes your program stronger. It makes you more resilient to the slings and arrows of addiction, made manifest by incessant urges and cravings.

If you been thinking about drinking or drugging after abstaining for any length of time, sharing can save your recovery. It can save your life! Furthermore, if you are actively battling an alcohol or substance use disorder, picking up the phone and sharing with us what you are going through is the first step to lasting recovery. Silence is addiction; recovery is communication. At Celebrate Hope we can help you achieve your goals and heal from the insidious disease of addiction. Please contact us today.

Addiction Recovery: Experience, Strength and Hope

The 12-Steps model is one of the more common roads for one to take in the journey to recover from a substance use disorder. For more than 80 years, individuals caught in the maelstrom of addiction have turned to the rooms of 12-Step recovery, such as Alcoholics Anonymous. What started as two people sharing their story with one another, overtime morphed into a program where millions of people with the disease of addiction work together to live a spiritual life free from drugs and alcohol.

We all have different stories. All of us came to the rooms of recovery by a different road. But, at the end of the day, our stories are remarkably similar. With an open mind, one can easily see that no one living with the disease of addiction (active or not) is all that unique. As much as we all imagine that we are unique, that is our addiction or our path to it was somehow special, as one’s disease would lead one to believe, at the end the day the driving forces that led to and perpetuated the vicious cycle are quite the same.

A “normal” person may try a drug on more than one occasion, and think nothing of it. Whereas, others being exposed to a substance will have a far different experience and develop an insidious relationship with drugs and alcohol due to genetic, psychological and environmental factors. If the aforementioned explanation seems ambiguous or nebulous, that is because it is; while addiction experts and researchers have a basic understanding of what precipitates an addiction there is still much that is not well understood.

 

It Doesn’t Matter How You Got Here

People who are new to recovery, will often feel an urge to at least try explaining how this happened. Where they zigged when they should have zagged. But, when all is said and done, such explanations and experiences are only of value when it comes to not repeating past behaviors. Simply put, the road that brings one to the abyss of active addiction, is not the same road you will take to recover from the disease.

We can’t walk back down the road of our past, identify where we made a wrong turn and correct course accordingly. Rather, one must forge a new path. A journey that requires not only adopting, but showing deference to the principles and traditions that have saved the lives of those who have come before you. In the “rooms,” you will be asked to share your experience, strength and hope by relaying what it was like (active addiction), what happened (how you came to the realization that one’s course was no longer tenable) and what it is like now (the transformation which resulted from living life one day at a time and practicing the principles of recovery in all your affairs)?

It may seem like an onerous task, and it is most certainly. But, through honesty, humility and continually reminding yourself that without taking these steps the outcomes are bleak. In the rooms of recovery, you are taught how to learn from your past, by living for today, so that you may have a future.

 

Giving It Away Is The Gift

It is interesting to note the transformation people undergo, as is evident by what is shared. In early recovery, one is in total disarray. In a fog of one’s own shame and regret, incessant and pervasive thoughts about how your best thinking got you here. Newcomers are still so close to their disease that to talk about anything but what it was like out there is an impossibility. But those who are willing to do the work, follow direction and are honest (even when it hurts) have a fighting chance at not only achieving long term recovery, they will be in a position to share the strength and hope—potentially aiding others in their mission to live a spiritual existence.

Many, if not the majority, of people who enter a program of recovery are hopeful that manageability will be returned. They look around at those who have significant recovery time, they hear about how those peoples’ lives have been put back together from a multitude of infinitesimal pieces. Some of whom getting their families back, holding good job, driving their own vehicle (registered and with valid insurance), etc. It can be easy to see all those things as being the gift, or gifts of recovery. However, those are merely the byproduct of the true Gift of recovery. The miracle of living a spiritual life free from the bondage of self, helping others recover as they help you recover, simply by sharing one’s experience, strength and hope. Having an active role in another's recovery is the Gift, you get to keep your recovery because you freely give it away.