Real Friends In Recovery

Recovery is a gift! Setting aside the first benefaction, life, those who work a program are awarded loads of excellent opportunities. Trustworthiness and accountability are a couple of salient aspects of note that accompany those living a life free from drugs and alcohol. Being able to rely on others for support, to have your back, when the going gets tough is another miraculous thing that staying clean and sober offers people.

Let’s face it, when you are drinking and drugging, people only tend to stick around when things are good. At the first sign of conflict, the majority of your using buddies would cut-and-run; and, hopefully, they are no longer a part of your inner circle. Today, you have something that you’ve probably not experienced in a very long time, maybe never, the gift of community.

Owing to working a program of recovery, the individuals in your life care about how you are doing. There is a good chance that you have become a vital component of your peers' program, and together you are making progress (another gift). However, people who are new to abstinence and spiritual maintenance may find it hard to sever ties with their past completely. Putting down the "booze" and "dope" was one thing, saying goodbye to people who you have known for years is not always a simple feat to accomplish.

Real Friends In Recovery

Those who’ve committed to living life on life’s terms have to wrestle with the reality that some individuals from their past must go. If long-term abstinence is to come about, hanging around with people who are still using is not conducive to one’s well-being. Relapse in early recovery is often precipitated by trying to maintain old relationships. Even though treatment centers, sponsors, and “oldtimers” enjoin people who are new to the program to let go of unhealthy connections, many ignore the advice.

If you recently completed rehab, it’s likely that you are trying to decide how to inform the people you used to imbibe or get high with, that you are making changes. It isn’t easy, but please think long and hard if such people are actually your friend, or if they were instead relationships of convenience. It’s no secret that misery loves company. Those same people may try to convince you that having just a little of a substance won’t hurt; they may try to downplay the severity of your condition. Do not give in, do not believe what they are saying.

People do not seek treatment by accident! Your life had to be pretty unmanageable to invest the kind of time and money that help demands. If you believe in your heart-of-hearts that you are an addict or an alcoholic, then keeping your distance from anything that can jeopardize recovery is critical.

Naturally, there are several ways of discontinuing contact with old peers. Sometimes ripping the band-aid off quickly, is the most effective. Of course, specific relationships may be more complicated— mainly if romance is a part of the equation. In such cases, ask your sponsor or support group for advice; they have been where you are today and can steer you in the right direction. Investing energy into fostering relationships with people who share your goals will go a long way and carry with it its own set of rewards.

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Having Fun Finding Yourself in Recovery

The stakes of addiction recovery are incredibly high; a wrong turn or wrong decisions can lead one down a path toward relapse. If you are working a program, then you know that there are not any guarantees; in order to achieve lasting recovery, you need to be ever vigilant in the pursuit of progress, not perfection. You pray, go to meetings, take care of your obligations, eat right and get plenty of rest; which are all useful practices for sustaining a program of recovery. Those who make it in the program are people who waive what they want, in service of what they need. Making progress often rests on making sacrifices, it usually depends on doing the opposite of what you feel like doing from one day to the next.

Structuring your life around a recovery routine is instrumental; at a certain point your daily movements become muscle memory, you don’t even have to think about your next right move. When you follow a set of directions long enough, the choreography of recovery becomes part of your DNA, seemingly. However, progress in your life is also dependent on balance; recovery is about far more than going to meetings, doing step work, etc. One must make a point of being a part of the world, getting out there, seeing new things and meeting new people.

Working a program asks that you don’t do anything that can jeopardize your program, but that doesn't mean you should always stay in your comfort zone. People with years of active addiction are often unfamiliar with themselves when newly sober. Many don’t know what their passions are because drugs and alcohol didn’t permit such fancies. Much of recovery is self-discovery; getting to know the person that is You. Early on in the program it is natural to be guarded, to follow every instruction to a T—which is a good thing; and yet, you may find at times that you are taking yourself too seriously; in your quest to stay on track you find yourself hesitant to do anything that involves letting loose.

 

Having Fun Finding Yourself in Recovery

One of the most significant gifts the program affords is meeting new people from many walks of life. Each of us has a unique story and experiences that we should share with each other. Some of your peers may engage in activities that are foreign to you, if they ask you to go for a bike ride or a paddle board ride consider saying yes before the alternative. Maybe you befriend an artist who invites you to an exhibit or a poetry reading, what do you have to lose by going? After all, only a brief part of your life is in the rooms of recovery; there is a lot to be learned outside.

“Besides, nowadays, almost all capable people are terribly afraid of being ridiculous, and are miserable because of it.” —Fyodor Dostoyevsky 

Now that summer is upon us you can engage in activities that the winter prohibits, depending on where you live of course. Anything you can do to stay out of your head will pay off immensely in the long run. Engaging with your peers may do more to keep you clean and sober than you think. If you are doing the Work and going to meetings, then you are well within your right to get out into the world and have some fun. Explore parts unknown to you, immerse yourself in activities that force you to open your mind; doing so can result in some unexpected transformations and strengthen your resolve for long-term recovery.

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If you are struggling with alcohol or substance use disorder, please contact Celebrate Hope at Hope by the Sea. We can show what you need for achieving lasting recovery and give you the tools for everlasting progress.

Seizing the Day In Recovery

Each of us has hopes for the future, looking forward often seems to be a part of our DNA. However, when a person is in the grips of active addiction it is challenging to have dreams for the days ahead; about the only thing one can think about is maintaining the disease and avoiding withdrawal. Managing an addiction is a 24 hour-a-day job which does not afford most people many opportunities for dream quests that have a basis in reality.

Most active addicts and alcoholics think about recovery on a regular basis; and, what it would be like to lead a life free from dependence. Although, without help, the vast majority of such individuals are unable to bring about lasting changes.

Those who resolve to seek assistance and begin a journey of recovery quickly discover a whole world of opportunity. After recovery commences, slowly the mind starts to clear up, and one can start thinking about their future. It is reasonable and healthy to set realistic short-term goals in early recovery. With each benchmark a person checks off the list, they are one step closer to achieving long-term dreams. In each case, each person has their path, and there isn’t a standard time that it takes to see one’s hopes come to fruition; the point: patience is key to survival in recovery. Reminding oneself that good things will happen as long as one continues to do the work can make a huge difference.

Seizing the Day In Recovery

Working a program of addiction recovery is a tremendous endeavor, the pull of the disease is substantial; keeping one’s focus is key to staying on track in recovery. Each day, people in the program must recommit themselves to the cause of sobriety; some days, redoubling one’s efforts is necessary. Individuals who have been in the rooms for several months often allow their program to become stagnant; they stop making a daily commitment to progress, toward working for something more significant.

When a program becomes sedentary, it is easy to revert to living in the past or spending too much time focusing on what is next in life. When this occurs, people lose sight of the precious present and what they have to do Today for bringing about their dreams for tomorrow. Goals are dependent upon doing the work; just refraining from drugs and alcohol is not going to help one meet their objectives.

It’s OK to think about what the future holds, but fixating on it is a sure path to problems, i.e., relapse. Conversely, those who pay little mind to the future and keep their “mind’s eye” on the present, position themselves for success. At times it helps to remind yourself that the way life in this instant, is precisely the way it should be; see in your daily actions some higher plan, even if you can’t see it clearly. Take the opportunity each day affords you to become the best version of yourself there ever was; and, with each passing week, you’ll find that you are one step closer to fulfilling dreams.

"Let us make our future now, and let us make our dreams tomorrow's reality." —Malala Yousafzai

 

Addiction Treatment

If you are suffering from addiction and/or a co-occurring mental health disorder, please contact Celebrate Hope at Hope by The Sea. We can help you end the cycle of addiction and provide you with the tools and skills necessary for achieving lasting recovery.

Recovering from Relapse After SLIP

If you attend meetings of addiction recovery regularly, let’s start by saying that you are on the right track; lasting recovery is ever-dependent on continued maintenance manifested by routine. Prayer, meditation, meetings, sponsorship, step work, and paying it forward are all necessary ingredients for achieving long-term recovery. Those who show up and follow direction, are the people who succeed at keeping their disease at bay. People who are unable to do such things are usually unable to stay the course.

When sobriety loses its priority (SLIP), it’s only a matter of time before one’s addiction resumes control over the dominion of Self. That which protects one from acting upon triggers and cravings loses its strength when one puts other things ahead of recovery. When that happens, relapse is typically a foregone conclusion. Those of you who attend meetings on a daily basis are guaranteed to find yourself in the company of people who at one point let their program take precedence; relapse is a part of many peoples’ recovery story. If you are new to the program, you might consider paying extra-special attention when people talk about a previous relapse; doing so will provide you with valuable insight into your program.

Relapse doesn’t need to be the end of one’s recovery; in fact, it can be the catalyst for an even stronger program moving forward. You’ve probably heard people say that recovery is about progress, not perfection. We, all of us in recovery, are human; each of us errs at times, and unfortunately, sometimes that leads to a relapse. What’s more, the slip-up itself is of little importance, it’s what one does afterward that is most salient.

 

Recovery 2.0

Everyone in recovery knows the dangers that the holiday season poses to one’s program, and each year during this time individuals slip up for any one of many reasons. Whatever the perceived causes of a relapse are, they can all be boiled down to people losing sight of their mission—live life on life’s terms, one day at a time.

Remember, committing oneself to living by the principles of recovery is about more than just not drinking or drugging. Programs of recovery are a model for living an honest, open, and productive life. In a sense, the Steps are a recipe for creating the best version of yourself; a person who people turn towards rather than detract. The road to relapse may start with neglecting meetings and step work, but it ends with one acting in ways reminiscent of their old behaviors. Selfishness, self-centeredness, and dishonesty rise inside people from the depths; the abyss of one’s psyche where the disease of addiction resides. If such traits are not nipped in the bud immediately, they place individuals on a fast track to relapse.

 

Recovering from Relapse

You might be a person who found trouble during the holiday season, and hopefully, you have already committed yourself to practicing the principles of recovery in all your affairs. If not, it’s likely a sign that you are still using and are letting fear or guilt block your way back to the program. Natural feelings to be sure, after all, nobody wants to identify as a newcomer in front of their peers, again. Please do not let that be a cause for staying “out there,” members of the recovery community don’t pass judgment on those who relapse. We open our arms lovingly, and eagerly await your return.

This is a program of fellowship, sometimes our peers fall or lose sight of their recovery. We help each other when things are rough, and encourage each other to continue moving forward. Recovery isn’t a competition, there are no winners or losers, and your popularity is not of any great concern. You are not the first to relapse, and sadly you’ll not be the last; be grateful that your relapse wasn’t fatal, get to a meeting, and grab a 24-hour chip or key chain. Your chair is waiting for you, and your experience will help someone else avoid a similar SLIP, believe it or not.

In some cases, more help is required; if you need extra assistance, please contact Celebrate Drug Rehab. We are standing by 24/7, 365 days a year.